Happiness Project Update: How Am I Doing?

Note: You can find all earlier Happiness Project posts by clicking on "Happiness Project" in the list of labels in the left margin of this blog!

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For the past month, I have been working on detoxifying my life by incorporating more exercise, drinking more water, and replacing toxic personal care products with safer, organic brands.

My greatest personal triumph has been making my way through the Couch to 5K running program; I am currently in week 5.  Each Monday and Friday, after dropping the girls off at their morning preschool programs, I head to the track and do the next assigned workout.  Either in the evening on Wednesdays, or on one of the weekend days, I fit in the third required workout.  So far, so good, on keeping the commitment.

It's all I can do to resist the urge to work on a craft project or take time for my art journaling, and head to the track instead!

The very first day, I had to alternate running for 60 seconds, then walking for 90 seconds, over a 20 minute period of time.  It took at least 40 minutes for my bright red face to return to its normal color! 

By the end of that first week, I was questioning whether I would be able to extend my jogging time, as required by the program's schedule.  So far, I have stuck with it, and at this point I am alternating 5 minutes of jogging with 3 minutes of walking.

The next workouts require a fast jump to 8 minutes, and then to 20 minutes.  I have decided to slow things down, and take a full week of workouts to make each of these time-increases.  I am trying to strengthen my legs and my cardio-vascular system, not kill myself!

I have made some interesting observations and learned some lessons over the past few weeks.  First, please do not wear heavy perfume when you go to walk around the local track; it makes those of us struggling to breathe evenly through a tough jog want to hurl! 

Likewise, please don't stand next to the track smoking a cigarette; it kind of defeats my healthy-lifestyle goals to breathe in your second-hand smoke. 

And, while I'm being a little crabby here, please don't walk three abreast, meandering around the track to share your gossip and memories of the good ol' days, forcing me to get around you by dodging bushes, benches, and American flag memorials as I must run off the track to do it.

I get myself through the jogging portions by writing blog posts in my head, planning displays for my upcoming craft show, and observing the other people sharing the track with me.  I've seen plenty of folks listening to iPods or talking on the phone, but I was particularly intrigued by the man, about my age, walking around the track while flipping through papers on a clipboard; now that's some strange multi-tasking!

As expected, incorporating all of this exercise into my life has made it super-easy to increase my water intake.  I easily fill my 24-ounce water bottle three times throughout the day, and usually have some additional water besides.  I've noticed that getting thirsty makes me a little irritable.  Not that I needed a new source of irritability, but at least it's as easy to remedy as drinking some water!

My third resolution had to do with finding safer and healthier alternatives to some of the products I use.  I am only at the beginning stages of this process.  I made a list of all the personal care items I use--soaps and lotions, dental care, hair, makeup, that sort of thing.  Then I found a website called GoodGuide.com where I could find a rating for most of the products I use. 

The site alerts me to ingredients in the products that put me at a greater risk for cancers or various forms of body toxicity.  I discovered for example, that my Skintimate Shave Gel was like slathering cancer on my legs, and my Colgate toothpaste scored a 0 on a 12-point rating scale!  I focused on the items that scored the lowest and seemed to pose the greatest health risk. 

So far, I am trying new brands of shave gel, shampoo, facial scrub, conditioner, body lotion, and toothpaste.  I don't like the organic shampoo and conditioner I am trying, so there will be some additional investigation there, and I need to look into new hair spray, powder, eyeliner, and blush. 

Once I started looking into the ingredients that are put into some of these personal care products, I was so amazed by what is allowed in our country!  Being aware of this issue, I am seeing more and more articles in the mainstream press (even seeing an article in Elle magazine while getting my hair cut) alerting people to be more conscious of what they are unwittingly putting into their bodies.

I've decided to extend this set of resolutions for one more month, since I have a long way to go to finish the Couch to 5K program, and I still have many products to consider and possibly replace, including laundry and dish detergent.  I am doing this Happiness Project to incorporate some important changes in my life, so it's not something I feel any need to rush.

Thank you for sharing this Happiness Project journey with me!

Happiness Project: Resolution Area #2

You can click here to read my post about why I am pursuing a Happiness Project.
You can click here to read my post about my first set of resolutions.
You can click here to read how I did with my first set of resolutions.

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When I first considered a second set of resolutions, I wanted to do something related to diet and exercise.  As I looked over a number of articles I had saved over the years, as well as articles in the August 2011 issues of various magazines, I discovered a more over-arching theme that "gets at" my goals for this month:  detoxifying my body.

Please note:  There will be NO juice fasts, and NO enemas or colonics for me this month (whew, that's a relief!).

Every single resource I came across recommends drinking lots and lots of water--for better skin, healthier organs, and longer life.  I picked up a book at Borders in its final days called Secrets of Longevity:  Dr. Mao's 8-Week Program.  Dr. Mao recommends a whopping 64 ounces of water per day.  I recently bought a BPA-free plastic bottle from Target that holds 24 ounces, and I am currently drinking at least 48 ounces per day.  I am going to work up to filling it three times a day from just two. 

I've never had any problem drinking lots of water; I don't have to add juice or fruit slices, or fool myself into getting more of it than I can easily bear.  Once I start exercising, I think getting that additional 16 ounces won't be any problem at all.

Which brings me to...exercise!  It makes every articles that gets published --"Ways to Beat Stress," "Ways to Lose Weight," "Ways to Live Longer," "Ways to Detoxify Your Body," etc, etc, etc.

I have never been able to incorporate exercise into my life on a regular basis.  I was the kid who got a doctor's note excusing me from physical activity at church camp because I had just had oral surgery.

I even got my required high school PE credit by taking bowling by correspondence.  I kid you not--my dad took me bowling and signed off on my scores, and it fulfilled my PE requirement so I didn't have to take gym class. 

Now, I find myself looking wistfully at the folks I see through fitness club windows, sweating it out on treadmills and StairMasters, and I've often wished I was among the joggers I see on weekday afternoons and weekend mid-mornings. 

My first plan was to join a local YMCA and use the mornings when my girls are now in preschool to finally get some exercise.  I was taken aback to discover that an individual membership costs $744 for a year.

Then Christina, my closest friend since high school (you can see her picture here from our 20-year reunion), told me about the Couch to 5K program.  When we talked about it, she was in week 4 and could jog for five minutes at a stretch--which was five minutes longer than she had ever been able to jog before!  I have printed out the program (which you can find here), and week after next, when both girls are in preschool, I'm going to get started. 

If this "exercise thing" sticks, then I might reconsider a YMCA membership when the weather turns cold, and I have to contend with snowy sidewalks and icy roads.

For the last part of this month's "detoxify my body" resolution, I am going to look into my current household and personal health care products to assess how many toxins they are introducing into my home and my body.  Then I am going to investigate some more natural, organic house and body care products that will reduce all the chemicals I'm being exposed to on a daily basis.

I want to find out what safe, organic brands I have access to in markets nearby, and how much I am willing to pay to make the switch to less toxic ingredients.  This will include makeup, hair care, skin care, cleaning products, and laundry detergents. 

I've read so many additional ideas for detoxifying, and I will likely incorporate them in the future, but I don't want to try to do so much at once that I end up doing nothing.

I was pleased to see deep breathing on several lists of detoxifying strategies because it is both fun and gratifying to have resolutions from the past carry over into my current efforts!

I have also determined that food will form an entire resolution of its own.  I've already gotten plenty of ideas for incorporating healthier, less toxic, and potentially more interesting foods into my diet.  I may begin to play around with some of these ideas this month, but a concerted effort will have to wait for a future set of resolutions!

Have you tried any organic, non-toxic beauty and household products that you could recommend to help me get started on that part of my resolution? 

My Happiness Project Resolution Area #1: Did I Manage to Be Mindful?

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You can click here to read my post about why I am pursuing a Happiness Project.

You can click here to read my post about my first set of resolutions.

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As anticipated, the hardest part of my Happiness Project has been keeping up with my accountability chart.  In fact, I stopped trying to check off my resolutions almost immediately.  While Gretchen says more than once in The Happiness Project that holding herself accountable through the chart was KEY to keeping her on track, I decided that my project is more informal than hers, and I could let myself off the hook.

But I DO think of my resolutions on a daily basis; none has fallen by the wayside. 

I have faithfully said a morning prayer that has helped me greet the day with a positive and grateful attitude, as well as greet the girls cheerfully, even when they wake up a little bit whiny.  I’ve started including prayers for others as I’m making the bed or brushing my teeth, sometimes with specific people and needs in mind, and sometimes simply a general prayer for all those busy households trying to get everyone launched to work and to school.

The second most successful resolution has been deep breathing.  I use it whenever I feel irritation or anger begin to flare, and I would say that 9 times out of 10 it calms me enough to prevent yelling or any words I might regret.  I’d like to incorporate it regularly throughout the day—proactively rather than reactively—to see if it keeps irritation at bay, before it even rears up.

I’ve learned in the interim this little trick to make sure I am reaching my full “breathing potential”:  Place one hand on your belly and the other hand on your chest.  When you breathe deeply, the hand on your belly should rise, while the hand on your chest should not. 

I also received the tip to say a word on your exhale—some state of mind you would like to achieve perhaps, such as “calmer” or “serene” or “peaceful.”  And I read about a basic meditation that simply calls for counting as you breathe:  1 on the inhale, 2 on the exhale, 3 on the inhale, 4 on the exhale, etc.  Doing this keeps me focused on the breathing and less likely to get distracted until I’ve replenished plenty of oxygen.

I never ended up incorporating the pebble in my pocket; most of the pants or skirts I wore in the early days of this resolution had no pockets in them, so the pebble never became a habit for me.  I don’t consider this a problem, since I never really forgot about the breathing I had resolved to do.

I’ve done less with “eat well, eat less, eat mindfully.”  At LEAST once a meal, I do pause to remember to slow down, chew more thoroughly, and really think about what I’m eating.  I know I’m successful to a certain extent because I’m always the last one eating! 

One of the first days I tried doing this, we were celebrating my husband’s birthday.  The girls were excited to get through dinner in order to enjoy a piece of German chocolate cake.  Everyone had finished their entire meal, and I hadn’t even started my salad.  They were all looking at me expectantly—I have to light the candles and bring the cake over, after all!—so I found myself scarfing spinach leaves so as not to hold things up any further!   I definitely understand how eating slowly and chewing more thoroughly leads you to eat less, so that you don’t end up staying at the dining table all day to get finished!

I am definitely a carnivore—I love a good filet mignon, pork chops have always been one of my favorites, and I eat more chicken than anything else.  But I’ve noticed that I have little interest in thinking too deeply as I chew a mouthful of meat.  It would be enough to turn me into a vegetarian if I made it an everyday practice.  I find it a little distasteful to think too specifically about the animal’s flesh I am consuming.  (See what I mean?  Kind of gross!)

I was just reading An Altar in the World, by Barbara Brown Taylor, and she was reflecting on the fact that moving to rural north Georgia, near the chicken farms, put her in touch with the source of her food.  She would pass the chicken barns and drive behind the chicken trucks, feathers flying against her windshield.  “I saw what dies so that I may live,” she writes, and explains that, while she did not become a vegetarian, she “began cooking it and eating it with unprecedented reverence.”  I like the sentiment of an increased reverence for the animals that gave up their lives that I might be nourished by them, but I’m not sure it would help my appetite very much!

“Eating better” has taken the form of trying new recipes that I’ve clipped from magazines and tucked away in file folders for months, if not years.  They don’t necessarily represent better, healthier, or more wholesome/organic eating, but they make me feel good about cooking and trying new things, not wasting ideas by filing them away.  I still want to buy more fresh fruits and vegetables from Produce Junction, as well as explore some interesting ingredients from Whole Foods or The Fresh Market.

I’ll be posting very soon with my second set of Happiness Project resolutions!

I’ve read on a lot of people’s blogs lately that they view September (with its “back-to-school” associations) as much as a “new beginning” and a time for resolutions as January.  Have you been trying to do something differently this month to make yourself happier, healthier, or more productive?

Happiness Project: Resolution Area #1

On Thursday, I shared my plans to begin a Happiness Project after reading Gretchen Rubin’s account of her own project.

When Gretchen began her project, she decided to focus first on how to boost her energy and vitality in order to be able to sustain all of the resolutions that would follow.  I was tempted to follow suit, but I have some more immediate concerns that inspired resolutions I got underway prior to “officially” deciding to conduct a Happiness Project.  I decided to focus on “mindfulness” for my first set of Happiness Project Resolutions. 

Resolution Area #1:  Mindfulness

Breathe deeply and mindfully.

In response to some of the outbursts of irritation and anger that I’ve been feeling for many, many months now, I was advised to try some deep breathing.  Like you, I have read about deep breathing in a zillion articles in various magazines over the years, and nothing, you would think, should come more naturally than breathing.  But I can’t tell you the number of times that I am driving down the road or sitting on the sofa and realize that it has been a LONG time since I’ve drawn a breath.  And when I do breathe, it is pretty shallow stuff. 

When I take a really deep breath, I feel immediately different.  I almost feel light-headed at first, and then I immediately feel more settled and energized.

I was absolutely astounded to see how often a fit of irritation, frustration, or anger was immediately—and I mean IMMEDIATELY—nipped in the bud with three or four deep breaths.  Something so simple is really pretty life-changing. 

In the writings of Thich Nhat Hanh, he explains that it takes one conscious breath to be back in contact with yourself and everything around you, and three conscious breaths to maintain the contact.  I had noticed even prior to reading this that I easily calm right down with three or four deep, conscious breaths. 

I’m not proud to say that I sometimes yell at my 2- and 3- year olds.  Even as I do it, I feel ridiculous, because they are so little and young.  The deep, mindful breathing gives me a moment to realize how inappropriate a yelling response is, and I can compose myself to respond in a much more even-tempered way.  Does it work all the time?  Certainly not.  There’s more work to do.  But it is making such a big difference.

Thich Nhat Hanh has a suggested technique:  He advises to keep a pebble in your pocket.  Periodically you should feel the pebble, touch it, hold it gently, practice mindful breathing, and smile.  The pebble allows you to pause and return to your breathing.  I thought I might give it a try as part of my Happiness Project.  I collected some rocks on the beach at Cape May on our recent vacation, and I have chosen a smooth, black pebble for my pocket (when my clothing has pockets, at least!).  Then, on top of remembering to practice mindful breathing, I’ll be able to call to mind happy, contented memories from the beach.

Eat less, eat better, eat mindfully.

Through my reading, the idea of breathing deeply and mindfully led me to discover the idea of mindful eating.  I like cooking, and I REALLY like eating, but I have a tendency to eat quickly and rush through the experience.  I notice that I like the taste of the food, and I even take notice of interesting textures.  But “noticing” and really “enjoying” are two different things.  I would like to spend some time considering how eating mindfully can both increase my enjoyment of eating, lead me to eat more healthfully, and eat less. 

In the writings of Thich Nhat Hanh, I found the idea that we really only need half the amount of food we actually eat every day.  I think we are so busy shoveling food into our mouths that we don’t pause to determine when we have had ENOUGH.  (That reminds me of a quotation I love from Susan Susanka:  “…what would happen if we stopped to consider the possibilities inherent in the word ‘enough.’”)

Thich Nhat Hanh suggests that we should chew our food 50 times before swallowing.  He advises us to chew mindfully, being aware of every bit of food, and eating/chewing with joy.  Be aware of each movement of your mouth.  Based on his writings, I created the resolution: “Eat less, eat better, eat mindfully.” 

On a related note, I just read an article by Dr. Mehmet Oz in the August edition of O magazine that says we should chew 20 times before swallowing and follow the Japanese practice of hara hachi bu, meaning “eating until you feel 80% full,” since you are probably 100% full, and your stomach just doesn’t know it yet.  Does anyone really count how many times they chew each bite before he swallows?  I think it might turn me neurotic, and it would most certainly stand in the way of meaningful dinnertime conversation.  But I appreciate the spirit of the suggestion to chew more times than I might be naturally inclined to chew.  And in the meantime, I want to be mindful of good tastes, interesting textures, and even the movements of my own mouth to better appreciate what my body is capable of doing for me. 

All that chewing and paying attention hopefully will lead me to eating better.  I’ve noticed that it’s a lot more fun to pay attention to foods that are crunchy and interesting (like dishes with fresh ingredients, things that are chopped into different sized pieces, and have different textures, like beans and vegetables) rather than things that are processed to the same basic texture.  As part of this resolution, I will be investigating some new recipes and some new places to shop for groceries.

Begin the day with a morning prayer.

I say a morning prayer with my girls every day before we eat our breakfast.  When they were going through a kind of “negative phase” with lots of whining and crying, I started incorporating something along the lines of, “Lord, help us to find joy and happiness in this day.”  The energy of the house really started to shift when we put the focus on joy and happiness each morning.

The Associate Pastor of our church has told us that if nothing else, she begins each day with the simple prayer, “Lord, direct my thoughts today.”  I’ve thought a lot about the simplicity and power of that request.

In Thich Nhat Hanh’s writing, he talks about offering a stick of incense to the Buddha each morning, and promising himself that will enjoy every minute of the day that has been given to him to live. 

All of this taken together leads me to resolve to say a personal prayer each morning before I even get out of bed.  I want to take just that first moment upon waking to greet God, thanking Him for the day He has given me, and to ask Him to help me live it according to His will.

In about a month, I’ll check in and let you know how my resolutions are going.  Then, while continuing to employ my resolutions related to mindfulness, I’ll describe the next area of resolutions. 

If you were going to begin a personal Happiness Project, where do you think YOU would begin?

P.S. I just noticed that this is my 100th blog post!  Thank you for sharing part of this journey with me.

Introducing: My Happiness Project

After years of hearing about Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Happiness Project, I finally picked up a copy to read on the airplane to and from my 20-year high school reunion a couple of weekends ago. 

I was immediately inspired to pursue a Happiness Project of my own. 

Like Gretchen, I’m not interested in “extraordinary change”; I don’t need to change careers or move to a different country.  And like Gretchen, I don’t want to “reject my life”; I’ve got a good thing going here! 

As she puts it, “I [want] to change my life without changing my life, by finding more happiness in my own kitchen.” 

It sounds like just the thing I need to do right now. 

I’ve been a stay-at-home for four years now, and, while I am fortunate to feel totally comfortable in that role, rather than conflicted with a desire to return to work, I can see how some small changes to my life could really increase my everyday contentment and engagement with what is going on around me. 

I find myself to be much more impatient and prone to angry outbursts than I ever have been in my life before.  I’ve got the little aches and pains that start to plague a body heading very quickly toward age 40.  I’ve got two little children whose upbringing and well-being are central to my concerns, and my own life is very focused on doing this motherhood thing “right”.  I have a deep and abiding love for and faith in God, but feel that I do not necessarily reflect that day-to-day or maintain relationship-building with the most important Person in my life.  I have the most amazing husband I could have ever hoped for, and with two little children in the house, I want to guard against our marriage turning into a co-parenting relationship. 

These are the features of my life that make me think a Happiness Project could make a real difference.

Whenever people write about their efforts to increase their happiness, they always subject themselves to criticism that they are being “self-indulgent” and “whiny.”  I have spent too many of my adult years being overly-concerned with what other people think of me, seeking approval outside of myself, and fearing criticism.  (You’ll probably see something about that in my Happiness Project down the road!)  So, I will put all of that aside, because I think this project could really hold some solid benefits for me.  However, I DO welcome your thoughts and feedback along the way!

On Saturday, I'll share with you my first set of Project Resolutions!